Daisy and the Trouble With Unicorns Read online

  Contents

  CHAPTER 1

  CHAPTER 2

  CHAPTER 3

  CHAPTER 4

  CHAPTER 5

  CHAPTER 6

  CHAPTER 7

  CHAPTER 8

  CHAPTER 9

  CHAPTER 10

  CHAPTER 11

  CHAPTER 12

  CHAPTER 13

  CHAPTER 14

  CHAPTER 15

  DAISY’S TROUBLE INDEX

  About the Author

  Kes Gray is one of the UK’s bestselling writers for children, with over two million copies of his stories sold. He is the author of the award-winning DAISY picture books and fiction, as well as the creator of the chart-topping OI! series with illustrator Jim Field. Kes lives in Essex.

  Some words about unicorns:

  “Add another one!”

  Daisy

  “Add two more!”

  Gabby

  “Try three more!”

  Daisy

  “Try five more!”

  Gabby

  “It’s working!”

  Daisy

  “It’s really working!”

  Gabby

  “We have lift off!!!”

  Daisy & Gabby

  More Daisy adventures!

  DAISY AND THE TROUBLE WITH LIFE

  DAISY AND THE TROUBLE WITH NATURE

  DAISY AND THE TROUBLE WITH ZOOS

  DAISY AND THE TROUBLE WITH GIANTS

  DAISY AND THE TROUBLE WITH KITTENS

  DAISY AND THE TROUBLE WITH CHRISTMAS

  DAISY AND THE TROUBLE WITH MAGGOTS

  DAISY AND THE TROUBLE WITH COCONUTS

  DAISY AND THE TROUBLE WITH BURGLARS

  DAISY AND THE TROUBLE WITH SPORTS DAY

  DAISY AND THE TROUBLE WITH PIGGY BANKS

  DAISY AND THE TROUBLE WITH VAMPIRES

  DAISY AND THE TROUBLE WITH CHOCOLATE

  DAISY AND THE TROUBLE WITH SCHOOL TRIPS

  JACK BEECHWHISTLE: ATTACK OF THE GIANT SLUGS

  JACK BEECHWHISTLE: RISE OF THE HAIRY HORROR

  To the Booneycorns!

  CHAPTER 1

  The trouble with unicorns is they can get you into trouble. Especially toy unicorns who are secretly real unicorns. If toy unicorns just stayed being toy unicorns instead of turning into real unicorns who can whisper in your ear in actual human language, then Gabby and me would never have got told off by our mums. And I wouldn’t have been forced to have a bath in the middle of the day!

  Gabby and me never even had a unicorn until a week ago. In fact we had made a secret pact to never ever EVER even get a unicorn! I mean, everyone in our school is OBSESSED with them! It’s like a great big giant unicorn wizard has cast a huge magic spell over the whole wide world so that the only thing that children can think about is unicorns! Children in our school have unicorn school bags and unicorn pencil cases and unicorn pens and unicorn pencils. Paula Potts has got a unicorn key ring, Sanjay Lapore has a unicorn drinks bottle, Vicky Carrow has unicorn socks, Craig Alexander has a unicorn lunch box, Barry Morely has got a unicorn calculator cover, Jack Beechwhistle says he’s got unicorn underpants but we don’t believe him, Lottie and Dottie have got matching unicorn duvet covers (not at school, at home) and even Mr Copford our headmaster has a unicorn-shaped air freshener hanging from the mirror inside his car!

  It’s like the whole world is turning unicorn!

  Which is why for ages and ages and ages me and Gabby have been absolutely totally definitely determined to never EVER EVER EVER EVER have anything to do with unicorns. Or to be unicorn obsessed like everyone else. Because we’re individuals.

  Trouble is, it was Gabby’s birthday a week ago and she invited me to her party.

  WHICH ISN’T MY FAULT!

  CHAPTER 2

  Gabby is really lucky. Her birthday is always in the summer holidays when the sun is shining and we don’t have to go to school. Mine isn’t. My birthday is always in March when the clouds are clouding and we DO have to go to school. (Unless my birthday’s on the weekend. Which it hardly ever is.)

  When Gabby phoned me to ask if I would like to come to her birthday party I was really pleased. I knew she was going to ask me because she always invites me to her birthday party. (We’re BFFs forever.)

  I was even more pleased this time though, because this time she wanted me to be her guest of honour!

  The trouble with being a guest of honour is you can’t just be one. You have to be asked by someone who wants to honour you.

  “I’ve decided to keep things really small,” Gabby said, “so we can have each other all to ourselves!”

  When I realized that not only was I going to be honoured at Gabby’s birthday party but I was going to be the only friend who was actually invited to her party (apart from her mum, dad, nana and grandad, and they don’t count because they’re family, not friends), I nearly dropped the phone!

  “I’d love to be guest of honour at your party!” I said to her, giving the phone a big kiss. “I’d be honoured to be guest of honour at your party!”

  Trouble is, then I suddenly had a terrible thought.

  “Wait a moment,” I said. “If you keep your party really small you won’t get any presents! Well, hardly any. You’ll only get one from me!”

  “I don’t care,” laughed Gabby. “My mum and dad always buy me loads of presents. And they give me birthday money. Plus my nana and grandad will bring me a present so I won’t need any more than that.”

  “Well, you’ll definitely want my present!” I said, already knowing exactly what my present to Gabby was going to be.

  “It’s not a unicorn, is it?” she laughed.

  “Of course it’s not a unicorn!” I giggled. “It’s much, much better than that!”

  As soon as I finished my phone call to Gabby I ran to tell my mum I was going to be guest of honour at Gabby’s party.

  “You and Gabby are like two peas in a pod,” she smiled.

  “I prefer conkers in a shell,” I said. “You know I don’t like peas.”

  “Well, whatever you’re like,” said my mum, “you are very lucky to have each other.”

  “I need to wrap Gabby’s present!” I said, jumping up from the sofa and charging up the stairs.

  “I’ve hidden it in the bottom of my wardrobe,” shouted my mum. “It’s inside my suitcase!”

  “I know,” I shouted back. “I found it there on Sunday!”

  The trouble with presents is they need to be wrapped really properly, especially if the present is a Sky Pirate All Action Stunt Kite! Sky Pirate All Action Stunt Kites are one of the best kites you can get.

  They’re a really exciting shape, they are really good colours, they’ve got All Action strings, plus my mum could actually afford to buy one AND have money left over to buy wrapping paper too! Not just any old wrapping paper either; wrapping paper that had blue sky and seagulls all over it! (Seagulls fly in the sky and so do kites, so a pattern like that is absolutely perfect for wrapping up a kite in!)

  “Where is the wrapping paper?” I shouted from the top of the stairs. I absolutely couldn’t wait to start wrapping!

  “It’s under my bed!” shouted my mum.

  “Where’s the sticky tape?” I shouted.

  “Where it always is!” shouted my mum.

  “Where are the sharp scissors?” I shouted.

  “Out of harm’s way!” shouted my mum.

  When I had finally got all the things I needed (not including the sharp scissors) I laid everything out on my bedroom floor and got ready to wrap.

  Trouble is, everything got a bit complicated after that.

  The trouble with Sky Pirate All Action Stunt Kites is their really
exciting shape makes them really difficult to wrap.

  The trouble with rolls of wrapping paper is they keep rolling up into rolls again after you have unrolled them. Especially if you let go with both hands.

  The trouble with blunt scissors is they’re not in the slightest bit sharp and they won’t cut straight either!

  And the trouble with sticky tape is it sticks to absolutely anything! It sticks to fingers, it sticks to blunt scissors, it sticks to carpet, it sticks to your nose, it sticks to your bed, it even sticks to itself!!!!

  So in the end I got my mum to wrap Gabby’s present instead.

  I wrote the label though.

  Mum stuck it on.

  CHAPTER 3

  When I woke up on Wednesday I wasn’t at all sure what to wear. After all, it’s not every day that you are guest of honour at someone’s party!

  “Have you got any jewels I can borrow?” I asked my mum during breakfast.

  “Of course,” said my mum. “What would you like? Diamonds, sapphires, rubies or emeralds?”

  “REALLY?!” I gasped.

  “No, not really, Daisy,” she sighed.

  “What about a fur coat then?” I asked. “Or something golden?”

  “There’s a denim jacket in my wardrobe and some golden syrup in the kitchen cupboard,” she said.

  “How am I meant to look like a guest of honour at Gabby’s party if I’m not wearing jewels, a fur coat or anything golden?” I said.

  “Just go as yourself, Daisy,” my mum smiled. “Gabby has invited her best friend Daisy Butters to her party, not the Right Honourable Miss Daisy Buttersby-Smythe. If you turn up looking like a mayoress she’ll probably end up curtseying to you all day.”

  “What’s wrong with that?” I asked.

  “It’s Gabby’s birthday, not yours,” said my mum. “That’s what’s wrong with that!”

  “What about something silver?” I asked. “Or silver looking?”

  “You can borrow my silver necklace on four conditions,” said my mum.

  “What conditions?” I asked excitedly.

  “One: you don’t break it,” said my mum.

  “I promise I won’t break it.” I nodded.

  “Two: you don’t lose it.”

  “I promise I won’t lose it.”

  “Three: you don’t even think of taking it off until you get home from the party.”

  “I won’t even WANT to take it off when I get home from the party!!!” I smiled.

  “And four: you put all the breakfast things in the dishwasher.”

  “Oh, Mummmmm!” I groaned. “I can’t load breakfast things into a dishwasher. I’m guest of honour at Gabby’s birthday party today!!!!”

  “Not until three o’clock this afternoon you’re not,” said my mum, undoing her silver necklace and dangling it right in front of my eyes. “Bowls, plates, cutlery and cups all in the dishwasher please, Daisy, and you can put the cereal boxes back in the cupboard too, please. And the milk back in the fridge.”

  Honestly, can you believe it? An actual guest of honour being forced to do things like that?!

  Oh well, I guess it was worth it in the end because at twenty to three that afternoon my mum actually did undo her silver necklace again and fastened it around my very own actual neck!

  You should have seen me! You should have seen it!! Mum’s silver necklace went SO well with my orange T-shirt and purple shorts!!!! Who cares if my trainers were a bit old.

  I had Gabby’s birthday card in my hand, I had Gabby’s birthday present under my arm and I had a necklace of honour hanging around my neck. I had never felt so important in my entire life!

  “We could pretend you’re my chauffeur, couldn’t we!” I said as me and Mum walked down our garden path to the car.

  “Don’t push it,” Mum frowned as she opened the car doors. “And don’t play with my rearview mirror,” she said as she buckled herself into her seat.

  “But I need to see my necklace!” I said, twisting her mirror round and down to face me.

  “And I need to be able to see the traffic on the road behind me!” growled Mum, twisting the mirror up and back towards her.

  “Don’t touch,” she said.

  “Oh Mum!” I said.

  “Let go,” she said.

  It was a good job it was still only about a ten-minute drive to Gabby’s or I think Mum’s mirror might have got pulled off! We would definitely have crashed the car. Well, Mum would have.

  Normally, my mum would always walk me to Gabby’s, especially if it’s sunny. Only she had decided to go to HARDWARE HAVEN after dropping me off. Apparently, the squeak I’ve been hearing in our bathroom isn’t a mouse singing in the bath: it’s the hinges on our bathroom cabinet door.

  Mum says the best way to stop squeaky hinges on a bathroom cabinet door is to squirt them with anti-squeak oil. Or buy a new bathroom cabinet. We can’t afford a new bathroom cabinet at the moment, though, so if you need to buy anti-squeak oil, HARDWARE HAVEN is definitely the place to go.

  I don’t know where I’d need to go if I wanted to buy a mouse who can sing in the bath. If I did, then I might even have chosen that over a Sky Pirate All Action Stunt Kite!

  Except Gabby’s got a cat called Satan, who likes eating mice.

  So I probably wouldn’t.

  CHAPTER 4

  Did I tell you Gabby has a new house? She moved there at the beginning of the school holidays. It’s really new and really posh; it’s even got a doorbell that does three different tunes!

  When we got there, I could see Gabby already standing on her doorstep waiting for me to arrive. Which was really brilliant but a bit disappointing at the same time, because I wanted to press the doorbell.

  Gabby was wearing a blue party hat on her head and a big wide silvery-coloured ribbon over her shoulder that said ‘BIRTHDAY GIRL!’.

  Mum told me to be on my very best behaviour and then helped me get the kite from the back of our car.

  “Is that for me?” shouted Gabby as we lifted it out.

  “You bet!!” I shouted back. “You’ll never guess what it is! It’s a Sky Pirate All Action Stunt Kite with action grip handles plus action strings and everything!”

  That’s the trouble with really exciting birthday presents. It’s impossible not to blab.

  Gabby looked really pleased with the present I’d given her even before she’d opened it! Thank goodness I hadn’t bought her a mouse that could sing in the bath.

  “Bye Mum!” I said, turning around with a wave. “See you at seven!”

  Mum drew a circle in the air at me with her finger and then pointed to her neck.

  “I won’t break it, I promise!” I said, giving her necklace a little wiggle.

  Then Mum wagged her finger, put her hands around her own throat and started wobbling her head.

  I’m not sure what she meant by that.

  “Come and see all my other presents,” Gabby said, tugging me into the hallway.

  “It’s solid actual silver,” I said, giving her first look at my necklace before anyone else got a chance to see it. “Because you’re my most special friend, my mum said that I could wear it!”

  Gabby squeezed my hand really tightly.

  “I’m honoured!” she said.

  “No, I’m honoured!” I said.

  “No, I’m honoured,” she smiled.

  “No, I’m honoured,” I chuckled.

  “OK, we’re both honoured,” she giggled, pulling me through into the lounge.

  “Hello Daisy!” said Gabby’s mum and dad the moment I stepped into the lounge. They were sitting on the sofa holding cups of tea and wearing party hats too.

  “Hello,” I said, with a waggle of my necklace. “My mum let me borrow it.”

  Gabby’s mum put her cup of tea down straight away and came right up to my chain for a closer look.

  “It’s beautiful,” she said.

  “Look, Daisy’s bought me a stunt kite!” said Gabby, tearing off the wrapping paper be
fore I had a chance to say my necklace was solid actual silver.

  “How wonderful!” said Gabby’s mum, picking the wrapping paper up off the floor and putting it in the bin. “Your dad will enjoy playing with that as much as you will!”

  Gabby’s mum was right. Gabby’s dad is the most outdoorsy grown-up I know. He does camping and walking and stick whittling and everything. In fact he is so outdoorsy he started setting it up straight away so we could play with it in Gabby’s new garden!

  “Come and see what else I got for my birthday,” said Gabby, yanking me out of the lounge and dragging me up the stairs.

  “I thought you said your nana and grandad were coming to your party?” I said as she pulled me into her bedroom.

  “They are,” said Gabby, “but my nana is having her hair done first. She’s always having her hair done!”

  Gabby’s bedroom was absolutely rammed with birthday presents. There were birthday presents on the bed, there were birthday presents on the floor, there was even a birthday balloon dangling from the ceiling!

  “I got a Stargazer telescope,” she said, “I got a science kit, I got a 3D jigsaw, I got some hair straighteners, I got some juggling balls, I got a bonsai tree growing kit, I got a bath bomb, oh yes, and I got a new bike, but that’s in the garage.”

  “You certainly got a lot of presents!” I said. “Which one is your favourite?”

  “YOUR KITE!” she beamed. “Let’s go and see if Dad’s finished getting it ready!”

  The trouble with kites is it really needs to be a windy day to fly one, especially a Sky Pirate All Action Stunt Kite.

  After about five goes we’d only got it to fly as high as Gabby’s fence, so in the end we decided to play with Gabby’s other presents instead. Well, try to play with them …